Thursday, April 28, 2005


So do people do it?! I truly wonder how people wake up early, make breakfast, get to work, are productive for the full 8 hours that day and then go to the gym, make dinner, do the chores and get ready for the following day...and these are single people I'm talking about here. Forget married people with kids...I in awe of how they keep it together. I am lucky if I wake up, manage to catch the bus, get to work...where I surf the net for a good amount of the day when I am not supposed to...go home, watch a little tv to decompress and make something to eat. Forget breakfast. Yes, I know it's the most important meal of the day but given the choice of an extra 15 minutes to sleep, or in my case, whacking the shit out of the snooze button for another 9 minutes of sleep, or breakfast...I choose sleep and the curse of the snooze button. I just throw a yogurt in my bag or hope that my stomach doesn't decide to sing it's little tune in the form of really annoying and embarrassing stomach grumbles. Don't you hate that?!

So with all the dating and subsequent contact...I'm feeling the loss of time. For over a week, I've had dishes in the sink, clothes on the floor and clean laundry I haven't even gotten out of the laundry bag. Not to mention the absolute need to vacuum and dust and reorganize things in my closet and weed out clothes for Goodwill or Buffalo Exchange. Oh, and lets not forget hanging up some "art" and climbing up on my handy dandy stepladder to try and pry the light fixture off the ceiling to change the stupid lightbulb in the kitchen. Couldn't they make that easier to do?! I just got a manicure...I don't wanna mess it up so I've been living off the range's light in the kitchen. Sad...but true.

I've cancelled my evening plans over the last two days to TRY and get this stuff done and you know what, nothing got done. I've been caught on the phone for hours and by the time I get off, post-11pm. I am just trying to unwind enough to go to sleep and chores are not my idea of unwinding. But then I don't think going to sleep at 12:30am and waking up at 6am is helping my cause any either. But at least this late night phone sessions are helping my phone-a-phobia...perhaps I'm in for a cure faster than I thought.

If you guys have ideas on how to get this all done, date and still have "decompress" time in front of the telly...let me know. I'm having issues juggling all this crap.

Ok, gotta go get an espresso now...thanks C!...for widening my options to "feed" my caffeine addiction. I have to make it til Saturday before I can spend hours upon hours being lazy and catching up on sleep. Oh, dear sleep...I miss you so!

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

"Remember that Time..."

NO! Not at band camp...sheesh...someone has been watching too much American Pie...

Seriously though, "remember that time..."How many stories start off that way?! Many an embarrassing one...but since I used this line in my previous post, it reminded me of another story from years ago. A few drinks, a late night and a Tainted Love show. Maybe it comes to the forefront since I am supposed to go see them (Tainted Love) this Friday with C. A few years back, C, AM and I went to the Last Day to see the show and have a "girls night out". We all love 80's and were set for a good time. We were at the bar, had a prime spot, I was drinking red bull vodkas like there was no tomorrow and trying to pick up this guy that had scooched past me near the bar. Ends up he was friends with the wild and crazy girl bartenders...surprise! About half way through the show, I decided to sit on the back of the chair...tush on the back and feet planted on the seat. Leaned a little too far and...yea, that's right...I fall into a sea of guys. Lovely! Talk about being graceful! I mean, I have always been a clumsy girl..but did I really need to be that clumsy?! Surprisingly, I still got the guy...for a while. Why isn't dating that easy nowadays? How come I can't just go out, get drunk, fall on a guy and have a few dates and call it a success?

Oh, and did I mention that instead of helping me up...C and AM, sat there laughing hysterically to the point of hyperventilation. Thanks guys...thanks a lot! Thanks goodness those guys I fell on helped me up!

I hope that doesn't happen on embarrassing!


Ok, I have to admit that I am phone-a-phobic. I'm sure that most of my friends have realized this as I opt for email conversations versus phone conversations. Let me explain a little something...after being a customer service slave for the largest hotel in San Francisco for over three years, you get a little gun, uh, I shy. You can only take so many people calling you to complain, coming up to you to complain or the guillatine of the service industry, made to go out and listen to someone bitch you out and complain in a lobby full of employees and guests. Lovely...NOT!! So given the option of choice in communication, I pick email because God and everyone else knows I am so fun and witty in written form but in person, or over the takes me a little while to be "on". To have the cute and witty (for dating) or the fun and sarcastic (for friends). Probably because I am waiting for someone to complain and trying to figure out a good excuse for whatever stupid reasoning is going to come out of someone's mouth.

It has been 4 years since my "slavery" years...but now I have the clients that say "how come such and such terminated"..."um, maybe because you didn't PAY!" I do not understand how the simple task of paying a bill is lost on so many people and who do they expect to fix it for them? Of course...ME! That's what I am here for...making sure that all 400 clients know when to pay, what to sign and remind them what they need to pay and why they need to sign. Dear would really f-in help me if you would 1.) OPEN your mail and 2.) read it AND reply. Never thought I would be a babysitter to grown-ups! Typical scenario is:

Me: Dear client, here's an email (or letter) I sent you last month to complete your desired transaction. I never heard from you so I am assuming you are NOT interested in moving forward.

Client: Oh no...I DO want to move forward. Please send me the forms and let me know what I need to do.

Me: Dear client, as my email or letter states, the forms are attached...please sign and return, let me know if these facts are still the same and send me a check for x amount.

Client: Ok, I have the forms...where do I send them?

Me: *Fax number is provided*, Dear client, what are the answer to my questions? *info provided from client* ok, great, I'll look for the fax and will wait for the check.

Later in the day...

Client: How much is the check supposed to be for and to whom and where do I send it?

Me: Dear client, as my email stated, this is the amount, you make it out to so and so and it has to get to me.

OMG!! Don't people read? And how do people who make 10x more than me 1.) survive in this world and 2.) make that much friggen money IF they can't read a simple email WITH instructions?? So after a few calls or scenarios like that from clients and my boss, I'm burnt out and just want to sit in a daze in front of the tv and decompress. Quiet can do wonders you know...but quiet puts the phone on the sidelines and the computer within reach.

I realize I am bad about phoning when I notice that it's been days, weeks or months since I have spoken to so and so...but it's even more in my face when you are trying to "talk" to a phone person when you are an email person. Guy #3 is a phone person in a big way and I am an email person in a big way. He hates email and I love it. He loves phone and I have to be in a "mood" for phone and when I am, he's not around and that makes for a fun (not really) round of phone tag. Makes communicating a little difficult...IM and text messages have surged to the forefront. Two forms of communication I haven't really used before but since I classify it as "quiet" communication...I'm adapting wondrously. It's a good compromise...for now.

For you curious folks, yes, Guy #3 and I have talked since fabulous date #1...via a 2 hour IM fest and a few text messages via cell phone. We are supposed to see each other on Thursday. Keep your fingers crossed!

I do realize that I need to get over my phone-a-phobia's not healthy and can make the dating game a little harder. So if I happen to call to chat, please don't fall down in your utter disbelief and confusion...the catholic guilt will set in that I really let *that* much time pass by and/or that you hurt yourself falling down from your disbelief of me calling. And then I'll associate calling you with "remember, that time I called and you fell down and had to be rushed to the hospital?" I really don't need that on my conscience, ya know. So you've been warned...and please pick up! My 12 year old sounding voice doesn't like the answering machine either...because, well...I sound 12.

It's all about baby steps towards picking up the phone and calling people...maybe even you!

Ghetto Hair

So yesterday I went to my hair stylist to take care of my ghetto hair. It was driving me crazy! Now ladies, I know you all know what I am talking about. We go through phases of "needing a change" and we go to the stylist and say:

Me: "I need a change. Please do something to my hair!"

Stylist: "Highlights! Let's add a little copper, chestnut and red".

Me: "Ok, sounds great...let's do it!"

And I religiously keep up these highlights for the better part of the year before the "need a change" cycle continues. And what ends up happening...ghetto hair! Ugh! That lovely look of 4 inches of dark roots and then light brown ends. Lovely...not! So I was getting to the point of must see stylist, C, or I may go insane! I had my appointment set for yesterday at 530pm but hadn't heard from stylist, C, so I called and left a message Sunday night at the ungodly hour of 1130pm to leave her a message saying "I hope you have me in your appointment book because I REALLY need to come in!" Luckily, I am and decide to color my hair back to my original color and get some face-framing layers. Love the cut...the color is always a shocker. As I stated before, I am super white and my natural hair color is basically one shade lighter than black. Makes for a dramatic that usually has me running to my make-up case to add some color to my cheeks if I am having a pale, tired-looking day. And frankly, I think stylist, C , went a little overboard on the black and not enough with the brown. WTF! I'll wait a couple of weeks for the color to settle before I make a firm opinion on whether or not I made the right decision.

But at least I don't have ghetto hair anymore!

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Must Love Dogs!

I went to go see The Interpreter with my friend, T, today and saw the preview for this new movie coming out in the summer called Must Love Dogs!

It's got good actors...Diane Lane, John Cusack *drool*, Dermot Mulroney *drool* and Stockard Channing. It looks like a typical chick type fluff movie. But I was sold on the movie just seeing John Cusack in the preview. I totally love him. I think he's great. Watching this preview, I was reminded of my current life. Basic review of the movie is that Diane Lane's character decides to sign up with an online dating service and had a lot of *cough* interesting dates. The one line that stood out was this one man Diane is on a date with saying "I've been on 17 first dates this year and no second dates" and then he bursts into tears. OMG, it's my life minus the tears and well, I do have a couple of second dates every one in a while. So far this year, I think I've been on about 7 first dates, 2 second dates and one third date.

I'm hoping things will change soon...the dating game DOES get tiring after a while...

Saturday, April 23, 2005


That word describes Date #1 with Guy #3 perfectly. I can't quite remember the last time I had a 7 hour long 1st date with someone and it not even feel like that much time has passed by. 7 hours! I'm still shocked. But I know you want me to get over the shock and get to the details already! Allright, I hear they are.

I was tired considering it was my 4th date in a week and my 5th night out. I DO NOT have the energy for this type of insane dating activity but I was looking forward to meeting Guy #3 because it seemed like he was planning on this being a rather involved date instead of the traditional coffee or cocktail meet up date. I was supposed to meet Guy #3 at this little tucked away bar in North Beach at 6pm. I am getting my stuff together at work when my coworker calls me to say it just started raining. What!?!!!??? No one told me it was going to rain! So I run out and find a cheapo umbrella for $5 so I can make it to the bar with my make up still on and in dry clothes. I head up to the bar which was a suggestion from co-worker D (Thanks D!) and by the time I get up there, I am pooped. That's a pretty far walk when you're out of shape, ya know. I was ready for a I get my drink, get a table and pull out a book. Not 5 minutes later, in walks Guy #3. He gets his drink and we tuck in at the table to start the "get to know you". This bar was kinda nice because it was pretty dead even though it was during Friday happy hour. Perfect place to be able to hear each other talking, etc. After a while, I ask the time and it ends up we were 10 minutes late for our dinner reservation. We bust ass out of the bar and head to the restaurant, but not before I assure Guy #3 that I didn't need help putting my jacket on since it was still nice outside. Wow, helping with a jacket...I thought that was a lost art!

We get our table at the restaurant and spend some time joking around about wines and trying to figure out what bottle of wine to get and we involve the waiter and finally picked out a nice red. Ordering entrees took another half hour because we couldn't stop talking. Dinner was great, touched on all sorts of topics and we had loads in common. I don't think that there was any real lag in the conversation. We sat around talking and finishing our bottle of wine when the typical Italian man selling roses walked into the restaurant and I started shaking my head but either Guy #3 didn't see me or he ignored me and bought me a rose anyways. *insert Awww, how sweet here* Well with all our talking, laughing and busying ourselves drinking that bottle, we managed to be the last ones at the restaurant. Now I don't wear a watch so I had to ask Guy #3 the time and it was a quarter to midnight. Dinner took up almost 4.5 hours! does that much time fly without even realizing it! Amazing! We decide to go to a nearby coffee shop to chat a little more and we continued our date for another hour or so over coffee and gelato before truly calling it a night at 1am.

Overall, I had a wonderful time...I can't even remember the last time I had a date like that not to mention Guy #3 has all the gentlemanly manners that seem to be extinct. I already mentioned the jacket thing, but there is the pulling out my chair, insistance on paying, opening doors, walking on the street side of the sidewalk and even paying for my cab ride home. Someone please pinch me, I think I'm dreaming. Ouch! Ok,, it really all did happen!

I do have a couple of side comments to make about having a first date in North Beach. Never before have I had total strangers making overt comments or suggestions to me while with another person, let alone a first date. Walking to the restaurant, Guy #3 and I got a lot of the classic "2 for 1...come on in" comments from all the "skin" places along Broadway/Colombus. We had one guy comment on how we even "look like a great couple". Mr. Italian rose vendor kept pushing Guy #3 towards me while insisting that I give him a smooch for buying me the "longest rose" and the guy at the cafe said that the gelato "tastes better with one spoon" when we asked for two. A good stare and gesture had that gelato guy "forking" over the second spoon. Never before have I enountered so many matchmakers in one place! Them Italians really wanna pair people up!

But despite the fabulous time, we didn't make plans for Date #2. Kinda hard to do when you are trying to say goodbye in a cab with the meter running. I think he had a fun time too but only time will tell. With that said...

Stay tuned for an update on Guy #3...he may just be promising. Perhaps that saying "third try (or third guy in this case) is the charm" is really true. Or however that saying know what I'm talking about.

Guy #2

I figure that before I go into the details about Date #1 with Guy #3, I should mention Guy #2. I guess there really isn't anything to say other than great guy, no chemistry. I'm thinking he felt the same way since I didn't hear back from him and our date had been on Tuesday. It's ok, no skin off my nose. Besides, he's a hard core climber and considering I huff and puff going up to North Beach from the FiDi, I'm thinking we aren't a good match. And there is no way in hell I am picking up climbing as a hobby.

Guy was great meeting you. If you ever want to get a drink after work and hang out, give me a call. It's always nice hanging out with a fellow bay area native. Good luck out there in the crazy SF dating scene.

Friday, April 22, 2005

A Friend is Worth Their Weight in Gold

We all know that friends are valuable and to have one true friend who is there with you through the thick and thin of it all is worth more than 10 mediocre sometimes there, sometimes not there for you friends. I am lucky to have many great friends who I have know for years, even decades. Yes, DECADES! Can you believe it? My longest known good friend is H (hi H!) and I have known her since the 4th grade, when I was like 8 years old. That means we've been friends for 21 years people. Wow, I still shock myself when I really think about it. We've been through a lot together. Lots of fun times along with a lot of blue times. We've picked each other up during those blue periods and I know I can count on her and C (Hi C!) should I ever need anything. I've know C since high school...that makes 15 years of friendship. Crazy, huh!?

So last night, after my date with Guy #1, I was standing at the bus stop waiting for the 5 wondering how I was going to waste 20 minutes since I JUST missed the bus. I sat down, flipped though my contacts on my handy dandy cell phone and see the name of a friend I haven't talked to in over a year...MB. MB lives in North Hollywood. Now, we all go through periods of time when you drop off the face of the earth and don't talk to someone and the next thing you know, months have passed by. What the?? I left messages for MB way back when when he was just starting to date this girl and all I kept hearing was "Val, it's love...I'm serious this time". OK, of luck to you because I know that the road and journey to love can be a difficult one. I left messages for MB and never heard back so I took it as a loss for the time being and figured I'd try some other time. Why do people always drop their friends for the new guy or girl they are seeing?? Friends are worth their weight in gold people! Don't forget that...

So I give it a shot....ring...ring..."hello?".

Me: "hello."

MB: "Oh my god!"

Me: "Dude, I have left you like 50 kabillion messages and you never called me back!"
(sidenote: I don't even need to say it's voice is that recognizable...sad but true)

MB: "That was like a year ago! Plus, I lost my cell phone with all my numbers, I thought you'd call me. You haven't called me in over a year!"

I, of course, start feeling guilty since I was raised Catholic and guilt is something they inject in you at birth so that when you're mother calls to tell you you don't visit enough, you're scrambling to get over there to not upset her. Damn guilt...I will defeat it someday! I feel bad that I really did let a year go by without trying again.

But we soon get over it and there is me, pacing with my cell phone at the bus stop, laughing, gesturing, lots of "oh no!" and "oh my god" and "I miss you" being said and catching up and reminiscing. I must have looked like a crazy person! But it was the happiest I had been all day. Sorry Guy is the truth. We talked for an hour about what has happened in the past year, what our old college mates are doing, upcoming vacations. And it ends up he is going to Puerto Vallarta at the end of May to celebrate his 30th! C and I are going in November. Puerto Vallarta is fabulous! Now we are trying to figure out when he can come up to visit me and I (and maybe C...C? You wanna go?) can go down to visit.

But there was one thing that stuck with me from that conversation. I was talking about all the moves MB had made over the 12 years we have been friends. We met in college in San Francisco and he left before graduation to move down to North Hollywood, than Dallas, than back to North Hollywood. He would move without telling me! I can't even remember how I even tracked him down...a birthday card I sent? An email? I have a really bad memory. Anyways, despite the moves, I would always "track him down". And he said, "Val, despite everything, you always managed to track me down. You're a totally great friend." Thanks you owe me $200 from all those quarters you borrowed during college to play Street Fighter in the arcade. Pay up dammit! That's why I've been tracking you down! You owe me! haha I'm totally kidding!

I'm just so glad that we connected. Anyone going to North Hollywood? I need a ride...

Date #2 with Guy #1

Last night I had yet another date. Let me tell you, this week has been insane. Four dates in one week is a bit much and I don't recommend it. Especially for someone so "low-energy" as I am. So last night was date three for the week but Date #2 with Guy #1(are you keeping up with me here...yea, I know, confusing). Guy #1 talked his head off during Date #1 and I couldn't believe that he talked so much about his likes and dislikes and school and family, etc. He's a nice guy and I didn't know if he was talking so much because he was nervous or if he really liked to dominate the conversation. At least he wasn't boring, we had some similarities so I would be able to interject a little something here or there before he would, again, talk my ear off. I decided that a second date couldn't hurt. I would at least find out if he was really just nervous or if he's a talker. Everyone, Guy #1 is a talker! We went and had dinner last night and dinner was nice but I felt like he was more interested in hearing himself talk and in telling me about his posters, furniture shopping, job and family and he barely bothered to ask me any questions about me, my likes, dislikes, music and movie taste, hobbies, family, friends, etc. These are all things that I LOVE and can talk about for hours...but remember...he didn't let me talk. I have learned, in the 50 trillion dates that I have been on, to ask questions!! You want to tell the other person about yourself and your likes but you also want to learn more about THEM. It's not all about YOU, you know. YOU are not the only person out on this date here. *sigh*

Dear Guy #1....sorry, but I think I am going to have to let you go. Good luck out there. I know dating in this city is hard.

Thursday, April 21, 2005


Welcome to my blog! Sit back...make yourself comfy and I'll tell you about me.

I'm Valerie...fog city dweller. That means I live in San Francisco. If you haven't been to my side of the US, San Francisco can be pretty foggy but not as bad as Seattle. Love Seattle.

I was born and raised in San Francisco which means I am a rare and almost extinct species. I should be charging money for people to hang out with me. I have run across more people from Bawston (yes, I know it's spelled Boston!), New York and the Midwest. What the hell happened to the folks from San Francisco? Oh yea, they all moved to Sacramento, Southern California, Portland or Seattle. I miss you guys!!

I take MUNI everyday (bus for you non-SF blog visitors) and it is the bane of my existence. You'd think that they would keep to a damn schedule if they are going to post it but NO! I am late to work practically everyday (Sorry M). You'd think I'd learn and just wake up earlier but sleep is precious and I'm not the best morning person to begin with. Thank goodness for the kind folks at Henry's who supply me with my morning cup of coffee and ask me if I am feeling better from my recent flu bout every morning. They are so sweet. Yes, I am feeling better despite coughing up a lung! Anyone out there have any home remedies for a cough? It's driving me crazy!

I'm a knitter. NO, that does not mean I am a "grandma". I'm 29 for Christ's sake...not 70! I don't make fun of your *insert favorite hobby or sport here*, so be nice. Besides, if you're nice and I'm bored enough, I may just make you a scarf.

I know all my knitting buddies in cyberland love seeing pictures on blogs of recent work and yarn stashes, etc. I am probably the last person on earth to NOT have a digital camera. I promise, it's on my list of "techie buys for 2005" and I'll have you all ooohhing and aahhhhing over the assorted fibers in my stash and the list of "projects" I have. I can't wait!

Oh yes, how could I forget being single in San Francisco. Being single in SF sucks the big one. I have more dating stories than anyone I know and don't worry, I will share them with you. I need to vent out my frustration somewhere! Grrrrrr! In case you don't know, San Francisco has a huge gay population which means that cuts the eligible number of men (for women) in half. I now have my face plastered up on the biggest dating service in America...take a wild guess. Hint: rhymes with catch, as in, where, Dear God, is my catch!? Oh and that saying "love is complicated, match is simple", is a load of crock. Anyone who has been on that site for a while will understand what I mean and you can contact me to commiserate. I know I am not the only's ok...I won't tell anyone!

I am Nicaraguan and am the most caucasian looking person you will encounter. I cannot handle anything spicy because I start having a coughing fit and turn bright red and considering how white I am, can be a little scary. As my coworker, D, will say, "Valerie, you may as well be Irish". Thanks D! Yea, so I am super white, have dark hair, can't handle spice, have freckles (where the heck did I get these freckles from!?) but that doesn't mean I am Irish! But if you happen to know a cute, tall, single Irish bloke with an accent, feel free to send him my way. You can hit that emaiil button on the left there. And yes, I can speak spanish (dad, I already told you I can't roll my rrrrrr's, stop making fun of me, ok!).

So those are some weird and random facts about me. Be prepared for some posts about random dates, knitting, muni and my interesting (to some) SF life.